Many parents and teachers have found that starting children in music lessons at three or four years old can have wonderful advantages. There is some evidence that starting lessons that young is a prime time for developing the musical ear while also setting the stage for a natural flow and expression later on. But starting children at such a young age is not without its challenges and parents can sometimes feel a little lost as to how to help their children learn.
One of the first things I try to remind parents is that progress in children of this age is often seen in spurts rather than in a consistent, gradual progression. In simple terms, it basically means that your child is taking time to form connections and it can be a while before those connections are strong enough to be evident. Weeks or even months can go by where your child is struggling with something and then suddenly one day, it comes quite easily. On the other hand, there will also be some ups and downs. Some days the child will carry out a task quite easily and the next day it’s a struggle. This is all very normal for children of this age, so we want to be reasonable in our expectations. So what can a parent do to avoid frustration and keep things progressing in a positive manner?
The first thing is to keep practice as consistent as possible. Daily practice may seem idealistic in the busy times we live in, but even a five or ten-minute practice session will reinforce learning well enough to prevent the extra time it would take the next day to get reoriented when a day is missed. Having a consistent time every day when the child is alert will also help prevent any irritation on the part of the child. When the practice is at a regular time, even if it’s only a few minutes, the child will know what to expect and this can minimize any acting out in response to being told it’s time to practice. Additionally, having a time that’s good for the child will help them not to develop a negative attitude towards practice.
What about the practice time itself? If the child is taking Suzuki lessons, then the parent will be involved in the home practice. Even if the child is not taking Suzuki lessons, it is highly unlikely at this age that the child will be totally independent in his practice and will still need some guidance from the parent at home. So the parent will want to watch the teacher closely and reinforce the lesson at home. For example, when the teacher is presenting new information, how does he or she break it down into small steps? How does the teacher touch the wrist, shoulder or fingers to help the child to relax? How does the teacher use games to teach certain concepts? In addition to following the notes and directions that the teacher gives, many parents find it helpful to take their own notes during the lesson.
It’s important to allow the child some autonomy in their learning. While a child at this age isn’t ready to make decisions as to how much music lessons should cost or how many years they’ll take lessons for, age appropriate choices will help them to feel that they’re in control of their learning. At your next practice, try questions like these with your child: Do you want to try that by yourself or do you want me to help? Do you need a marker on that note (piano key) or can we try it without a marker? Do you want to try it another time or do you want to go to something else? Do you need to stand and stretch or should we keep going? We’ve reached our expected time for practice; do you want to play some more? When you pose questions like these to your child, you might be surprised at some of the answers!
Keep in mind that you do want to be careful, as mentioned, to ask age appropriate questions. Asking your child if they want to practice today or waiting until 8:00 at night to ask them to practice might send mixed messages to the child. Remember, although at some point there was probably a discussion with the child regarding interest in music lessons, the child is still relying on you to teach them how to get benefit from them.
Finally, remember to commend your child often during practice for the things they do well. Keep commendation sincere and specific. Notice when they’ve focused well, cooperated, put forth effort or done what was suggested and then tell them that you noticed. With specific commendation, your child will feel more confident and secure in his practice.
By providing consistent practice periods, following the guidance of the teacher, giving age appropriate choices and commending often, many parents have found that they are able to manage their young child’s practice quite smoothly. But what does the child’s physical comfort have to do with effective practice? To answer this, look for an upcoming article on chair height and posture.